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A woman has reignited a debate about wedding guest etiquette after accusing two women of being “disrespectful” by wearing white, bridal-like gowns to her friend’s nuptials.
Isabella Santos Giha, who goes by the username @isabellasg3 on TikTok, uploaded a video from the wedding on Wednesday. In the clip, which she captioned: “Two girls wore WHITE at my friend’s wedding,” she filmed two guests who appeared to be wearing white dresses to the party.
The first guest could be seen wearing a floor-length lace gown which appeared to be a pale peach or off-white colour, while the second guest, who was filmed from behind as she sat at a table, appeared to be wearing a white off-the-shoulder gown with a white lace overlay. “This one wore a legit WEDDING DRESS,” the TikToker continued as she showed the second guest’s outfit.
In the TikTok, Giha then shared the bride’s reaction to the outfits, with the video showing the newlywed, who was wearing a white sequin ball gown and a tiara, looking disappointed. “The bride got sad,” the TikToker wrote in a text caption on the video.
In the caption of the TikTok, which has since been viewed more than 19 million times, Giha issued a plea to “never wear white at someone’s wedding”.
“Please never wear WHITE at someone’s wedding. It is sad and [disrespectful],” she wrote, before tagging the bride’s username @sisilozada.
In the comments under the video, many viewers expressed their shock over the dresses worn by the guests in question, with one person writing: “I can’t believe the audacity some people have,” while another said: “Omg the first one could’ve just been a poor decision, but the second one!! Oh my god I thought it was going to be the bride at first.”
“Please tell me they got kicked out!!” someone else wrote.
Others shared their own similar experiences, with one person revealing: “My husband’s cousin wore white on mine too,” while someone else said that the same thing happened at their wedding and the guest in question was “blacklisted” as a result. “What are they thinking…?” they added.
Another person said that, despite the generally well known wedding etiquette rule that white is reserved for the bride, they took extra steps to prevent guests from wearing white or off-white by requesting it specifically in the FAQ section of their wedding site. “I put no white or off-white dresses for guests in the wedding site FAQ and that they would be asked to leave if they did wear one,” they wrote.
Although the majority of viewers said they would be upset by the guest outfits, others defended the women on the basis that the wedding etiquette rule is only common in some cultures. “Laughs in Nigerian culture. I recently realised this was a thing. Been to a wedding where the guests were asked to wear white,” one person wrote, while another asked: “Is this an American thing?”
Someone else questioned why people were angry over the outfits, as they claimed it’s “not like people aren’t going to know who is getting married or whose wedding they are at”.
According to Diane Gottsman, a national etiquette expert and founder of The Protocol School of Texas, who previously spoke to The Independent, the rule still applies for most weddings, as she noted that “white is still reserved for the bride” and that guests “should select another colour” when choosing an outfit. She also said the no-white rule should be followed by guests of all genders.
As for why guests should avoid white for a wedding, wedding dress designer Madeline Gardner told The Knot that it comes down to “the most important thing to keep in mind,” not upstaging the bride.
“When you’re a guest at a wedding, the most important thing to keep in mind is not to upstage or upset the bride,” she said, adding: “It’s safe to stay away from any outfits that are predominantly white, cream or ivory.”
On the bride’s TikTok, where she has posted videos from her wedding, viewers have taken to the comments to share reassuring messages, with one person writing. “You looked so much better than the girls who wore white.”
The Independent has contacted Giha and the bride for comment.
